Sheesh!

AHHHH! UGHHHHH! Grrrrr!!!!! No, I'm not mentally ill; no, I'm not confused; no, I'm not stupid and irrational (at least not all the time); yes, I am old enough to comprehend simple instructions on how to perform relatively simple tasks; no, I don't need a man to do everything for me; yes, I am capable of being a responsible productive adult. Any other questions you'd like me to answer? I HATE when people try to make me feel like I am two inches tall with a brain the size of a poppy seed and even less capability than physical stature. It drives me nuts! I go out of my way to let people know that I am not helpless, I am extremely independent, and I can manage most things on my own. If I need your help I will ask for it and my asking for help does not mean I need you to do it for me; it means I need help! I might not be the world's best and brightest but I am certainly not a dead light bulb either. I can do just about anything I determine I will do and my asking for help along the way doesn't mean I can't perform whatever task I am doing, it means I need some instruction on how to do something or some help with it and then you can move on your merry way and let me finish what I started. I don't want you to take it over and do it yourself; I want you to help me and that's it! Ok, I'm ranting. I'll stop. Sometimes the culmination of several things just gets to the point where I have to get things off my chest and since this medium allows me to do that, I do it. Sorry if you are completely annoyed. In case you missed it my day has been a bit frustrating. Nothing too terrible, but it is something that has been building and it finally got to be too much today. I was starting to get that animal trapped in a cage feeling and I knew I was going to have to let it all out sooner or later. I'd rather rant at no one in particular than scare someone venting at them. So, while this hasn't been one of my favorite days I will survive. Actually, there were some funny moments with my kids and the day is not over yet, so there is still hope for it. I think the stress of trying to talk to advisers and teachers, looking at graduate programs, looking for a new job, trying to budget for the next two months, and get ready for the GRE is starting to take a toll on me. It's a good thing the week is half over and the weekend will be here soon. I'm going to need it!!!!!

Something Different

I know I already posted for the day, but something really different happened and I just had to blog about it. I guess I should have seen this coming and I feel really stupid that I didn't, but I definitely didn't. I was completely blown away this evening when one of my customers called me at work and asked if I would meet him for dinner when my shift ended. He was pretty persistent and wouldn't take an easy turn down. I wiggled my way out of it this time but he promised to try again and I'm wondering what to do with this guy. He obviously thought about this long enough to plan and call me the one night I work and he let me know that one refusal was not going to be all it took. I was left wondering what to do. My coworker thought I should take him up on his offer and just see what it would be like. He said it would be "a learning experience". While I am very flattered that the man thought well enough of me to ask me out I am still a little shocked that things went that far so quickly. What in the world? I'm so used to being viewed as too intimidating to be forthrightly asked out. Most of the guys that do ask usually phrase it very carefully so as not to get the wrong response from me. You know, the funny thing is I hate turning them down. I feel bad for them and I can't hardly stand to say no fearing that they will feel rejected. It's even worse when you actually like the person who asks you out. I think this guy that asked me out is a pretty nice guy. He's easy to talk to and yet he's has enough intelligence to actually keep a conversation going. He's very polite and seems like a really nice guy. So what do I do with him? That will remain unanswered here.