I Am Learning

I am learning so many things right now. Sometimes I feel like my head and my heart will explode from the information overload, but alas, that is just my over-active imagination at work. The most important thing I am learning right now is to have faith; faith in what God has spoken to me, faith that He is ultimately in control, faith that He will fulfill His promises. Of course there is so much about faith that I have been taught and know with my head, but now I am finding that it is absolutely essential that I live that knowledge out, and that is a whole new learning process. I never knew that it would be a struggle and a fight to believe God and what He said. Having faith in the words and promises that God has spoken to you takes effort, takes you clinging to that faith with everything in you even when it seems like the impossible, takes standing firm no matter what and not wavering in your convictions. It's hard work and the discouragements and temptations to give up abound, but what I am believing for is worth fighting for and so that leaves me with only one choice. I must trust God and exercise my faith no matter what happens, no matter how it looks, no matter how I feel, no matter what anyone says; and that is what I intend to do. Yes, it is a learning process and I am going through it every day, but I know if I keep at it I will eventually learn the lesson and I will be able to see the fruit of my faith. Lord, give me the strength to reach that day.
Side note: I read this today and thought it was really good, so I'm passing it on to you.

IMAGINATION V. INSPIRATION
"The simplicity that is in Christ." 2 Corinthians 11:3
Simplicity is the secret of seeing things clearly. A saint does not think clearly for a long while, but a saint ought to see clearly without any difficulty. You cannot think a spiritual muddle clear, you have to obey it clear. In intellectual matters you can think things out, but in spiritual matters you will think yourself into cotton wool. If there is something upon which God has put His pressure, obey in that matter, bring your imagination into captivity to the obedience of Christ with regard to it and everything will become as clear as daylight. The reasoning capacity comes afterwards, but we never see along that line, we see like children; when we try to be wise we see nothing (Matthew 11:25).
The tiniest thing we allow in our lives that is not under the control of the Holy Spirit is quite sufficient to account for spiritual muddle, and all the thinking we like to spend on it will never make it clear. Spiritual muddle is only made plain by obedience. Immediately we obey, we discern. This is humiliating, because when we are muddled we know the reason is in the temper of our mind. When the natural power of vision is devoted to the Holy Spirit, it becomes the power of perceiving God's will and the whole life is kept in simplicity.

Friday

It's Friday morning and I have never been so thrilled to have a week behind me and the weekend in front of me. I went to bed last night feeling pretty bad and woke up this morning feeling even worse. of course, being the stubborn obstinate person I am I refused to stay home and get some rest, opting rather to tough it out all day. Now I'm beginning to wonder if that was such a great idea. I am so worn out. I've been so busy this week and there has been so much going on that I feel like I've been at some sort of training camp. I am sore and ache all over and I'm exhausted. I don't want to think, feel, or even exist at this moment. Oh well. Now to suck it up and function, because that's what we adults do. We don't play hooky or pretend we are sick so we can stay home and sleep or watch tv, and we certainly don't pass off our responsibilities to some one else. So, here I go trying to get through this day and hopefully it won't be so bad.

Gushing!!!!!

Sigh! I have been having such a good time today I hardly know what to say or even do. What's even more interesting about it is that I was afraid the day was going to be a bit of a disaster, and it definitely had its more hazardous moments, but God is soooooo good and everything has turned out well. You know, it's amazing how when you feel like you need God the most and you just can't go one single moment more without Him, He comes in the strongest and gives you such wonderful ability to go on, and not only to keep moving forward but the ability to do it with joy. I have lived the Scripture "The joy of the Lord is your strength" more times than I can count and each time it gets sweeter and better to experience. It's the times when God feels the furthest away, when your dreams are most unreachable, when your world is falling apart the most that God is actually the closest, working all things for your good, building you a new world that is far better than anything you can imagine. His ways are surely not my ways and are so much higher than mine, and I am so thankful. I'm even more thankful that He lets me live out His plans for me, His awesome-beyond-belief plans, even when I screw up so bad and make more of a mess than is humanly possible to fix. I just love that He keeps working on me, never giving up, never settling or letting me settle for second-best, but always striving for His perfection. I love that as I trust Him more He gives me more faith to believe His Word and His promises and that makes me eligible to receive more blessings from Him and the fulfillment of all the dreams He has birthed in me that take faith to bring into existence. Ok, I'm gushing now. Sorry. I just so love being in love with Jesus. I've experienced being in love with a man, and it's a great feeling, but it is nothing compared to having a love relationship with Jesus. He never leaves, never has to second-guess His feelings for you, never disappoints you, always helps you and encourages you and helps you grow into the person God intended you to be. I don't know how to say it any other way; I'm just totally in love with Him and so, so, so grateful to Him in with me all the time. I wouldn't trade Him for anything in this world, and I wouldn't trade what He has for my life for any other plan or idea of living out there. Nothing compares to my Saviour and the life I have with Him.
I'm going to post some music. Some of it is really old songs from my childhood, but they are good songs and I'm feeling nostalgic, so here they are.
Well, this one didn't sound like this when I was a kid, but it's still good.


Classic!!!!!!

Just a good song.

Praise Through A Hard Time

It's been a hard weekend of sorts. My world has changed so drastically in the last three days that I hardly know which end is up and what to even think at times. My head has felt like it is spinning from all the changes and various goings on and by body feel like a wrung out rag from all the mental and emotional stress. But, God is still so good to me and I want to thank Him and praise Him for all the blessings He has bestowed on me, the wonderful and amazing things He has and is doing, and I am looking forward to the fulfillment of all the promises He has made. I was praying this evening and telling the Lord how I felt about the various things happening in my life right now and He reminded me of a passage of Scripture I hadn't read in quite a while. I looked it up and decided I would post it because it fits so well with my current mindset.
Even though the fig trees have no blossoms,
and there are no grapes on the vines;
even though the olive crop fails,
and the fields lie empty and barren;
even though the flocks die in the fields,
and the cattle barns are empty,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord!
I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!
The Sovereign Lord is my strength!
He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
able to tread upon the heights. Habakkuk 3:17-19

My paraphrase:
Though my heart is aching with pain,
and my pillow is wet with tears;
Though my body quakes with sobs,
and my eyes hurt from crying;
Though my dreams lie shattered around me
and my hopes are badly crushed;
Though it seems my faith has failed me,
and my God has left me destitute;
Though the promise seems unfulfilled,
and the answer but a phantom;
Yet I will rejoice in the Lord!
I will worship the God Who is truly great!
He alone is my strength, my comfort;
and He restores my soul,
Giving new life where there was death,
renewing my strength when I am weak,
Giving comfort when sorrows abound,
drying my tears and increasing my faith.

I sang in a song in church today and it was such a comfort. The words to the chorus where much needed: "Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarm. Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms."
Jesus, help me lean on You so that I might be truly safe as I trust You to perform Your will.