The summer is here, it is hotter than anything outside and I am glad that the chaos that could describe my life for the past four months is finally over. Sure, I am still busy and there are still a million and one things to do, but there is a lot less stress, and I am more than thankful for that. My future is a little unclear right now, but I am sure which direction I am heading, so that is comforting. My plans for the summer have changed about fifty times, but they are finally starting to take shape and I am looking forward to the next three months. In approximately two weeks I will be older than I care to admit, but even that isn't as bad as it used to be. I have decided to reapply for graduate school and it will be a struggle all the way, but I want this more than anything right now and I am willing to fight for it. I am looking at a couple of programs and staying open to anything interesting that might come my way. I am going to take the GRE again, which means more studying, but I will actually be glad for the opportunity to keep my mind occupied with something academic. I'm not sure yet if I am going to take classes this fall, but if I do it will only be two at most. Life has been, uh, interesting, to say the least, for the past few months and I am finally too tired to worry about anything. What will be will be and there isn't a need to spend good energy and time worrying about how to change things it is not in my power to change. Looking back at my life a year ago, I can say that I have come a long way and I feel like I have learned so many things, two of which most stand out: I am in such great need of a savior and Jesus is such a great savior. I feel like I am at a point where something new is starting in my life. I'm not sure where it will take me, but I am confidant that Jesus will be with me every step of the way and His Spirit will guide me as each bend of the road presents itself and I must make a decision as to which way I will go.
*About Me* I have found that I have a tendency to be extremely pessimistic. Shocked?! I'm sure most of those who truly know me know this is true. The main problem with this is that when I am relating things to people they tend to only hear the bad and never know how much good there really is. I could fairly complain about many things is my life, and I usually complain about more than what is fair, but that leaves out all the amazing things that have happened in my life. I've been thinking the past few days about various things in my life and looking back I can say that for almost every bad thing that has happened there has been something equally as good that has happened. In so many ways I have been blessed beyond measure and that is what I want people to see in my life. It's hard to not focus on the bad sometimes, but I have definitely come to the conclusion that it is so much better to focus on the good and let the bad go. So, here's to me learning to be non-pessimistic!
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