A Glimpse At What I've Been Up To

So I have started back to school and life is a bit interesting these days. I have been so busy I haven't had much time for posting. Now I have a moment, so I will try to fill you in, but beware, this threatens to be a lengthy post. My first day back was a bit overwhelming. My tram was late getting me to class and the swarms of kids EVERYWHERE was just about more than I could handle. It rained that day and I got drenched, what fun! I tried to find my way around and get my textbooks in the bookstore and that turned into a very long time of waiting in line. I truly felt like a little fish in a big sea. What was even more interesting to me was that I felt like a prehistoric fish next to all these fresh young tadpoles. It was a different experience for me. All that first week I noticed things that distanced me from my much younger classmates. I was annoyed by the girl sitting next to me in class who insisted on writing checks to pay all her bills while the lecture was going on. Her constant rustling of papers was so distracting! The girls who sat several seats down from me were continuously clacking on their keyboards as they Facebooked and messaged their friends during the lecture. I was quite put out by all this as I found it so hard to concentrate on what the professor was saying rather than notice what these students were doing. I have learned how to ignore them in the past three weeks, but I must say that I am shocked anew almost every week at the rude and disruptive behavior exhibited by quite a few students. Throughout these past few weeks I have relearned what it means to have homework due, quizzes and exams pending and papers to write. There has been so much to do and it has taken me a while to get back into the groove of being a student. I can say, though, that I am enjoying what I am learning. This semester has afforded me an incredible opportunity in research and I am enjoying every minute of it! Each week I have my interests sparked again and my curiosity peaked as I look at the world of language and neurological processing. My three hours of research work every Wednesday morning are the highlight of my academic week, and I would venture to say my week in general.
Apart from school there have been other tings happening, mostly unpleasant. Work has proven to be an enormous thorn in my side in more ways than one and I am finding that I have to learn and re-learn new ways of separating my work life and demeanor from my personal life and demeanor. It's a tough task for sure, but I am committed to learning how to do it. I have also been sick for the past week, and I mean really sick. It has been so frustrating! To be sick is unpleasant in and of itself, but it fell on a really bad week for me. I missed homework assignments and an exam and then had to turn in homework and take an exam in less than prime condition. It has been rough for me, but I survived it and now I am moving on. On the personal front, I am still more in love than I could have ever imagined possible and I think it's great! My Mr. Darcy is my best friend and one of my strongest supporters. He always pushes me to achieve more and do better and he truly believes that I can do it. I don't know if that is blind enthusiasm or a justified faith in me, but I love him for it. One of my best friends just had a baby and I am thrilled to once again have a little person in my life to brighten things up. I have eagerly volunteered to babysit the new guy and I am more than excited to spend time with him.
There really is quite a bit going on in my life at this moment. There are so many decisions to make that I can't quite keep up with all of them, but at some point I will have it all nailed down; at least what I need for right now. This semester has started with a bang - lots to do and experience and so many more challenges that I ever wanted, but it is a crucial time for me and I am excited to see what will happen. I think I can say with some confidence that by the end of the year I will have made some life-altering decisions and will have walked through some doors that will take me down paths I have never yet traveled.

A Lesson

I learned something this past week, or maybe I just became aware of something. There is a person that I deal with on a regular basis that I do not really enjoy being around. This person seems to be quite ridiculous at moments when you are really hoping that they will not be, and they seem to love a good drama, and they are completely impractical about just about everything, and . . . I could go on and on; but I won't. Suffice it to say that I find this person one of the most irritating individuals I have to work with and I am not at all happy that I have had to deal with them for so long. That said, I realized something this week. That person, as irritating as they are, has something that I cannot say I possess - a very tender heart towards people you are not acquainted with. I can be a very tender-hearted person and get great joy out of doing things for those I love. However, I cannot say that I have a very tender heart towards those I do not really know. I am not mean, just a bit indifferent. I work in customer service and I hate it. Yes, customers can be pushy and rude and hard to deal with, but that is not the only reason I do not like my job. I don't like being pleasant and happy and actually caring about someone I don't really know. I know that sounds incredibly harsh of me and very selfish, but I think it is the truth, however ugly it may seem. I realized this past week that for all of the annoying, irritating qualities my bothersome person may have, they have a very tender heart. They will go the extra mile and help just about anyone, and for that I have to give them some credit. I think they really have a desire to help people and give them comfort when they are in need of it. Perhaps I "have it together" in areas this individual does not, but I could definitely learn a thing or two from them in this area; and in some ways I think I already have.