Thunderstorm

I was at my mom's house today for a couple of hours before I had to go play for my children's choir at a performance. The afternoon was nice and I hadn't spent any length of time at my mom's in quite a while, so I was enjoying my time. The time to leave came and I had noticed that it was raining, but being that it is monsoon season here I didn't really pay attention to what was going on outside. I was dressed and ready to go about 10 minutes early and that's when I decided to look out the window and see what the weather was like. It was pouring rain, heavy rain. I could hardly see across the street the rain was so thick. Then the lightning and thunder started. The lighning was right above us making the thunder crack very loud and intimidating. I wondered how we were going to go outside and get in the car without being soaked. We decided to wait an extra 10 minutes before venturing out, hoping the storm would die down a bit. Nothing doing. It got worse. So, we started trying to figure out a way to get in the car without getting completely sopped. I had no umbrella and I was in a dress. Interesting scenario. I grabbed a towl and decided to make a run for the car. Now, I can't really run because my knee is still healing from the car accident last week, and I didn't really want to slip on the very wet front porch with its stairs that were a temporary waterfall. I carefully made my way to the car, getting very wet in the process, hoping to avoid the now very frequent strikes of lighting overhead. I step into the street to go around the car and get in the passenger seat and the water came half-way to my knees. Yes, the streets were flooded and it was still raining very heavily. I was thoroughly wet when I managed to get in the car. We then carefully drove down the street. Everywhere we went the streets were flooded and the cars looked like they were going to float down the street. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I haven't seen a rainstorm like that since I was a little kid. It reminded me of the year the Santa Cruz River overflowed and we were stuck on the west side of it for a couple of days until it finally drained enough for us to cross it and go home. After arriving at our destination 20 minutes late I counted the time it took to get in the car and to the performance: 1 hour. Crazy! It was an awesome storm to watch, though. One of the kids in the choir commented that they were pretty sure the drought was over. I think I agree with them. Hurray for the return of real Arizona monsoons!!!!!

Insecurities

As a strong independent female who is supposed to be sure of herself and her value I am not supposed to be insecure. Right? Problem: I am. Especially around other women that I feel are viewed as ten times more valuable than myself. I know this is juvenile and completely illogical and my clear-thinking mind is screaming at me for even entertaining the thought that somehow my worth is determined by those around me, but still, it's there. Even when I think I have mastered it it only takes five minutes of being in a room full of men and having some gorgeous, well-composed girl come walking in. It's almost unbelievable how little time it takes for my stomach to tie itself in knots and every imperfection I ever thought or knew I had to flash across my mind and that feeling of being totally insignificant and not even worth the slightest recognition to creep up on me. Of course, I have trained myself well and those thoughts and feelings are the result of years of behavior management training (subconscious, of course), and once I get a hold of myself I can change my state of mind rather well. However, I have noticed that deep down, on the inside, those feelings are very much real, those thoughts are very much a part of me and who I am. It shouldn't be that way. I know with my head what is a healthy way of looking at myself and viewing who and what I am, but my heart still clings to the fear that perhaps I am wrong and I am the sad excuse of a person I fight so hard not to be. I've mentioned recently that I am trying to deal with things in my life that have bothered me for years, areas that need healing. This particular area is one I have avoided at all costs. I have tried to cover it up, ignore it, or deal with it superficially, but now I need to face it head on and put this ghost from the past to rest. I know of several people who have tried this and failed. My only consolation is that God intends for me to be a whole person, free from anything that would drag me down, healed of all hurts, and He will have to help me do this. Perhaps it is hard for some of you to understand where I am coming from. All I can say is it is quite possibly the most difficult thing in the world to change your thinking when you have lived your life for over twenty years thinking you aren't worth anything, your value is only great enough to allow you to exist in this world and all the while hoping against hope that you are wrong and someday you will achieve enough worth to be of value to someone, maybe even attain that status of being priceless to someone. Maybe you think that is a bit dramatic; maybe it is, but the pain, hurt and torment of living like that cannot be summed up into any less dramatic words. Insecurity is quite possibly the worst thing someone, especially a woman, can live with. God did not intend for me to live that way and I don't wish to live that way any longer. So, being the independent, strong woman that I am, who is of value, I am determined to face this monster that has haunted me for years and vanquish it completely whether that take me a week, a month, or several years. I can do all things through Christ Who is my strength and that means even conquer the giant of Insecurity. It may be tough but I will overwhelmingly conquer through Christ Who always leads us in His victorious triumph.

Four Girls and A Beetle

Today was a great day. There were a lot of good things that happened, but something funny happened tonight on the way home. My friends and I had visited a friend and were on the way the home. My sister and a friend were in the back seat, my other sister was driving, and I was in the front seat. We had rolled down the windows to get some fresh air and a beetle flew in and landed on the dashboard. My sister who was driving freaked out. "Eek! Get it OUT!" She looked at me like I was supposed to do something. So, I reluctantly started reaching for the beetle to throw it back out the window. Unfortunately, the beetle had crawled down next to where the windshield reaches the dash and I couldn't get my fingers in far enough to grab him. I did, however, manage to knock him into the vent. "Great!" my sister said. "Now he's going to come back out and fly at me while I'm driving." "Don't worry about it. It's just a beetle." One of the girls in the back heard the commotion and launched into a story about beetles and spiders she'd captured. While she was talking the beetle flew out of the vent and calmly started crawling over the dash. My sister screamed again. "Get that thing out of here! It's dangerous for the driver!" "I can't," I replied. "I tried and I missed him." My sister then made a crack about how my fingers should be more nimble so I can do this sort of thing. I argued that it was not my agility that was a problem but the size of my fingers. They aren't made for picking up small bugs smashed inside the crevice of a windshield. She then told me I should be better at catching beetles. :o !!!!! Like I spend my time practicing this great skill. Ya right!!!!! My sister in the back seat then promptly asked me why I haven't employed myself in learning such an important skill. LOL!!! What a concept. Why hadn't I thought of it before???? Anyway, I kept trying to get the beetle out and only succeeded in knocking it back in the vent. The girl talking in the backseat stopped long enough to note my failure and then continued on with her story of the captured spider to which she fed a cockroach. My sister then came up with the bright idea of turning the vent on full blast and blowing the beetle out of the vent. Now mind you, this entire time we are driving down the road. At this point I think we are making the beetle more of a distraction than he could have ever been on his own. As she was turning the vent on my sister asked me if I thought it was a good idea, to which I responded, "Sure, if you want the beetle to shoot out at you while you are driving so that you totally distracted and quite possibly drive us off the road." She turned the vent off. The girl in the back finally wrapped up her story about the captured spider, ending it with a description of the fight between the spider and the cockroach. She then started talking about beetles that are flipped on their backs. I could tell she was just getting warmed up and was thankful we didn't have much longer to drive. We traveled for about 5 more minutes when the beetle resurfaced. No screaming this time, but my sister did flinch noticeably. I thought something in the road had scared her, but the talkative one in the back assured me it was the pesky beetle. We stopped temporarily to drop off the two girls in the back and my sister grabbed a piece of paper and attacked the beetle, finally sweeping it out of the car. The beetlewas gone, the incessant chatterbox in the back of the car was gone and I was laughing at the totally ridiculous situation my ride home had turned into. Sheesh!!!! I guess that beetle never knew what he was getting into when he flew into a car with four girls in it.

A Psalm

Not much to write today. Just wanted to post a Psalm I read yesterday and really liked. It says so much and is so appropriate for me and my life right now.

Psalm 27
The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?
When evildoers come upon me to devour my flesh,
My adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell.

Though a host encamp against me, My heart will not fear.
Though war arise against me, In spite of this I shall be confident.
One thing I have asked of the Lord, that shall I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord And to meditate in His temple.
For in the day of trouble He will conceal me in His tabernacle;
In the secret place of His tent He will hide me;
He will lift me up on a rock.
And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me,
And I will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord.
Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice, And be gracious to me and answer me.
When You said, "Seek My face," My heart said to You,
"Your face, O Lord, I shall seek."
Do not hide Your face from me, Do not turn Your servant away in anger;
You have been my help; Do not abandon me nor forsake me, O God of my salvation!
For my father and my mother have forsaken me, But the Lord will take me up.
Teach me Your way, O Lord, And lead me in a level path Because of my foes.
Do not deliver me over to the desire of my adversaries,
For false witnesses have risen against me, And such as breathe out violence.
I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see
the goodness of the Lord In the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord. Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for the Lord.

I love this Psalm. Truly God has been all this and more to me and I am waiting expectantly to see all the wonderful things He will do and all the blessings He will bring in my life.

Update

It is amazing how your life can change from one day to the next. Yesterday I was really busy with a full schedule in front of me and numerous plans for the rest of the weekend. I was in a car accident in the late morning and everything changed. All my plans went completely out the window. I am now very limited on what I can do because my knee was injured and the doctor's orders were to stay off of it. Oh sheesh! I hate, hate, hate being restrained. Also, I now am a needy person, which I also hate. I am so independent that telling me I need to rely on other people to get things for me or take care of me is quite possible a fate worse than death. But, here I am, staying off my leg so my knee can heal and having to ask people to help me do things. I guess there are worse things though. I am extremely thankful that there weren't any serious outcomes from the accident. All the passengers were banged up and a bit bruised but there were no serious injuries. I'm also thankful for all the support my friends and family gave me. My sister drove to the scene of the accident to bring me some pain meds because my knee was hurting pretty bad. I received numerous phone calls from people wanting to know if we were alright and telling us to call if we needed anything. It was an unpleasant ordeal but it was good to know how much people cared about us. Today I did a lot of relaxing and staying off my feet. It was actually hard for me, but I have managed thus far. This weekend I hope to relax and be able to go back to work Monday with little trouble. So, that's my update on me for now. I'll try to write more later.

A Tucson Night

I'm sitting outside on my back porch looking up at the sky. The vast deep blue expanse is powdered with thin, wispy clouds and dotted with bright pinpoints of star light. In the distance I can see the lights of the city spread out across the horizon. The city lights glimmer and twinkle at me, set off by the faint outline of the Catalina Mountains rising behind them. It's beautiful out here. The night air is still damp from an earlier rain but it is cool with a slight breeze that feels wonderful. I'm observing this amazing world we live in and I can see again just how incredible God is. As I look at the sky I can imagine just how enormous this universe is and how minutely small I am in comparison, and yet, God sees me, hears me, knows what I'm going through and is a part of my life. Being outside like this is such a nice reminder that no matter how crazy my life gets, no matter how upset I am, no matter how powerless to change or control things I feel I am, God is still God and He is taking care of me. Being out here, especially at night, always makes me feel closer to God. It's easier to think about things clearly and it's seems easier to hear what God is speaking to me. The past few days have been rough for me. Mostly the things that have been bothering me are things outside my control having to do with people I can't control. I haven't lost my joy and I can still say, just like last week, that God is so good and He is doing so much, but it has been hard to keep looking at all the good things when the bad is so very present. I guess these are the times when you really have to just make a choice to not let situations get to you. You have to keep believing what the truth is, what God says and not look at what is going on around you, especially when it is beyond your control. Of course, there is also the side to it that you help create your own messes and I am starting to see the results of several messes I have made over the past few months. However, it is not the end of the world and thankfully God does forgive us when we screw up and He can work in situations to fix things when we have broken them beyond repair. That is a comforting thought. It is also comforting to know that God is taking care of me and He knows how to stand up for me and fight my battles for me. He knows how to protect me, strengthen me to face any situation, and take care of those who seek to do me harm. I can't tell you how nice it is when I'm having such a hard time to look up and remember that Jesus is right there with me and He is helping me. Being out here in the peace and quiet, surrounded by so much beauty is soothing. I can smile, take necessary deep breaths, soak in the beauty around me, be in awe of my Creator and His handiwork, and be inspired to keep on going in life knowing Jesus is with me every step of the way and He keeps me in perfect peace when my mind is stayed on, confidently leaning on and trusting in Him.

My Day ?! ?! ?! ?!

Wow! My day has been so different. I can't say it's been full of adventure exactly, but somehow it feels that way. It started rather early this morning with me being sort of agitated, mostly because what I wanted for breakfast I couldn't make. Work was alright for the first three hours. After that, well, I won't even go there. I don't think there are words to describe the absolute infernous situation that is my job. So, after work I sat outside for an hour or so and read because my ride was late picking me up. I did enjoy the reading and outside was beautiful today, so, no big deal that my plans were a little off at that point. The problem came when my ride finally showed up and got me home with 5 minutes to grab clothes and put them on and then rush out the door to a performance. Needless to say I looked rather interesting when I arrived at the place we were performing, but smiling and pretending you know what you are doing will do worlds for you. Oh ya, and the 20 minute car ride to get there did help me pull myself together at least somewhat. The performance was great and I actually enjoyed myself. I then went home to watch my nephew and realized there was nothing to eat for dinner. I solved this by concocting some rice dish and spending the next hour in the kitchen getting it ready. When done, I sat down for dinner and to decide whether or not I was going to spend anymore time in the kitchen. As it turned out, I was missing some necessary ingredients for what I wanted to make and that canceled any further plans for cooking. I did a piano practice, lay on my couch and watched the amazing view from my living room window and then decided to take my nephew on a walk. When we got outside the front door there was an amazing, exceptionally vibrant rainbow in the sky. It was huge and the dark clouds in the background gave it the perfect backdrop for showing off its colors. We continued our walk but it started to rain. After walking around in the rain for about 15 minutes, watching a storm roll in, and hearing thunder and lighting grow closer I decided it was time to go home. I must admit that the little kid in me wanted very badly to stay out in that storm, but it was not to be. Back at home, my nephew settled down in the living room with one movie on the TV and one on his DVD player while I talked to my grandmother on the phone for a while. I came back to the living room and thought I was going to lose my mind with both things going at one time, but when my sister came in and started playing her violin I knew I was going to. There was the television blaring, a song playing on the DVD player and violin scales being run. Totally crazy!!!!!! This went on for about 30 minutes and then I had only the TV and the DVD to contend with again. Around 9 o'clock I sent my nephew to bed and I turned on something I wanted to watch. It was a thriller. I was sitting in a dark living room with a thunder storm going on outside watching a scary movie. Hmm. That sounds intelligent. It worked out well though. I was scared out of my mind by the time the movie ended and with my heart racing I gladly turned the TV off. Now I'm wondering how much of that movie I am going to see in my dreams tonight. Really, the guy was so creepy. Ugh, gives me chills to think about him. So, that was my very eventful/non-eventful day and I'm writing about it because the thought of going straight to bed after watching that movie was unthinkable. Now that I've written this I will attempt sleep.

NOTE: Have you ever looked for something your whole life, hoped it really existed, prayed your dream would come true and then been shocked and surprised and even scared when you wake up one day and realize you've found it? My automatic response: How do you know it is what it appears to be and in fact is the very dream you have wished for?

No Title

It's raining right now. There is a huge storm going on that has been going on for the past hour and a half. This is sort of unusual for Tucson, at least in the past 10 years, but it reminds me of what it used to be like here during the summer when I was a kid. I love it! I know, I know. I keep talking about the rain. I can't help it. It's been so long since we had a real monsoon season in Tucson. I had forgotten how great it is and how much I missed it. I'll stop now. Really, what I wanted to talk about was how amazing God is. I know it sounds so cliche to say God is awesome, but really, He is! It is incredible to see Him move and do things that only He could do. It's so easy to get caught up in what is going on in your life specifically and being so focused on yourself that you can't see anything else. Sometimes you can be so focused on one particular area of your life or one situation or problem that everything else becomes unimportant and you lose sight of how God is working and the things that He is doing. Taking a step back and reminding yourself that God sees the greater picture and is well able to work everything out for the good of everyone involved helps to open your persepective and see what God is doing. The past week has been an incredible experience with God. I have been able to see God move in so many ways, in so many areas, answering so many different prayers and just being the awesome God that He is. I just finished reading a book about someone I greatly admire and one of the main points of his story was that whether we see it or not, God is always working to bring about His plans and purposes in our lives. Even when things look so dim and you have to wonder where God is, He is still working, causing all things to work together for good. We make bad or even wrong decisions and we can mess things up, but He is indeed the Redeemer and He can work to turn even our mistakes and short comings into something wonderful. As I look back on my life and continue down this road that leads me closer to being the person God wants me to be, I am amazed and awed at how much God has delivered me from, how much He has blessed me, and how He has used my life and life experiences, even the bad ones, to work out His purposes and plans for my life. Only God could do what He has done for me and so many others I know. Truly, He has given me beauty for ashes and the oil of joy for mourning. I am so thankful, so deeply thrilled (perhaps more than my words could ever express) that I am my Beloved's and He is mine.

Good Times

This weekend has been great. Last night I went to see "Live Free or Die Hard" and I have to say that I absolutely loved it. I am partial to Bruce Willis anyway, but the movie was really good in it's own right, and I was more than happy that the language wasn't so bad the movie had to be rated R. I went with my younger brother and sister and we had fun. Today the college group from church came over to my house and we hung out there for most of the day. It was fun and relaxing and I so thoroughly enjoyed myself. Of course, there was quite the mess to clean up when we were done, but it wasn't too bad. Now it is starting to storm outside and I am waiting hopefully for a wonderful Arizona monsoon to start. I've watched the lightning for the past two nights and it has been a pretty incredible show. We actually had rain last night. It is such a great feeling to be in bed and hear the rain hit the roof and smell it as everything outside is being drenched. I love Arizona storms. I thought I'd post a picture of a Tucson storm just beginning to roll over the mountains. It's not anything like actually seeing a storm come in, but it is a pretty cool picture. Oh, I just heard thunder! Yaaaaa!!!!!

This Week

This post will be short. I just have a few things I want to say. The week has been so good. There has been some rough points and some great points but the best part is that I have been able to maintain my joy throughout the whole week. I have never been so aware of how great God is and just how good He is to me. There have been so many moments this week when I thought my heart would burst from being so full of happiness and the awareness of how good God is. I know that probably sounds pretty corny to most of you but it is the only way to sum up how I feel right now. I feel as though a hundred pounds has been lifted from me, as though I have been freed from a thousands chains. I don't feel silly or giddy, just so at peace and so satisfied with where I am. Also, there is such a sense of expectancy as I see God moving in so many areas of my life. I can't wait to see what He will do and how He will do it. It's more than just hope for the next day; it's anticipation of what I will have the opportunity to see and experience. I have never been more sure in my life that God is in control and He knows how to take care of me and those I care about, even when I don't know how or can't. He's just so amazing; I feel like I can't say it enough. So, I guess I'm saying this week was really good and I hope there are many more like it to come.

A Thought

There is nothing more sobering than the realization that you have been colossally wrong about something or that you have handled yourself in a manner that was completely wrong. In life we usually modify our thoughts and behaviors by what we know and what we are feeling at the current moment, but that can be dangerous. It is helpful to remind ourselves, and often, that there is always more to a situation, to someone's attitude, to someone's feelings than what you can see. The other person has a side too, and that side or perspective is every bit as important as yours. It is also important to remember that your own feelings and personal experiences are weighing on you at every moment, creating a bias in you that results in how you read situations and how you will handle yourself. So, when someone does something you have to judge not only what you see but what you may not see and what is going on in your own life at the time that may lead you to respond a in a certain manner. There are a couple of recent instances that come to mind for me and I can see how I did not read the situation correctly or respond in the correct manner. It's not that I was completely off in my observations, but I did not ever stop and think that perhaps there was more to it than what I saw and I never once thought that maybe what I was going through personally gave the situation a different appearance than what it really was. I was reminded of a valuable lesson I have learned before but had forgotten. You never know what someone is going through or where they are coming from, you don't know what they are thinking or what their perspective of life and even you is, so don't make assumptions about them and whatever you do don't let your actions and behaviors be ruled by what you think of them and how they are behaving. This makes for a lot less regret later on, believe me.

NOTE: I posted yesterday on what a great day Tuesday was and how good I felt. Yesterday at work was a small nightmare. It was quite possibly my worst day since starting to work there. However, I still had a small victory when I left. I was so upset and I thought for sure the rest of my day was going to be ruined because of how upset I was and worried about different things. I got in the car to go to a performance for my kids and I decided that I was just going to pray the entire way there, and I did. I asked God to help me calm down and to help me stop worrying about things that I can't change anyway. There's a Scripture that says, "Cast your care of Him, releasing the weight of it, for He cares for you." That's what I did yesterday. I just gave everything I was upset about to God and you know, my peace and happiness came back. The rest of the day was great, not because anything great happened but because I was totally resting in Jesus. I have NEVER been able to do that. I always have to worry; but not yesterday. I gave it to God and He took it and I am SO glad He did. God is so incredible, and I am so happy He is part of my life!

Interesting Day

Yesterday was a very interesting day for me. It was a good day but there were so many strange things that happened. The best part was that through it all I was in a great mood. I couldn't help laughing at something or other for most of the day. It wasn't that there was anything particularly funny about what was going on, I just had such inner joy that nothing seemed to bother me. I'll tell you about the day and then maybe you'll understand why laughing at anything was unusual. The first part of the day wasn't bad at all. Work was good and there was nothing too unusual that occurred. After work I went to watch my nephew for a couple of hours before I had to play for my children's choir. I had promised the guys at work I would bring them lunch today and I figured I could get it ready while I was watching my nephew. That's when things got interesting. I couldn't seem to find anything I was looking for and when I would come up with an alternative, that seemed to have something wrong with it. I didn't get frustrated, I just kept working to try and finish. While I was trying to cook the phone kept ringing. First it was my sister saying she wouldn't be able to come back and I would need to keep my nephew for the rest of the afternoon. Then it was someone from the choir informing me that one of the parents who usually transports the kids was at jury duty and would not be able to take the kids. That meant I would need to take some of them with me. This created some space problems as we would also need to carry the keyboard and the equipment that went with it. Meanwhile my nephew was in the living room flinging strings everywhere. He then moved to the area by my front door and proceeded to created a web from the front door entrance to the living room by tying strings from doorknobs and other bits of furniture (I often ask myself why my mother taught him to tie slip knots!). He thought this was great, I didn't agree. I finished up in the kitchen and cleaned everything up and then my nephew wanted to go for a walk. I agreed to take him but once we got outside I was sorry I had. It was so hot and humid! I was pouring sweat, my clothes were sticking to me, and I was supposed to be at a performance in an hour. That walk didn't last long. When we got home we picked everything up and left to go pick up the kids. We arrived at our destination and proceeded to unload the equipment and things really got interesting. Because of the tight space the keyboard had been taken out of its case and carried with no protection. As one of the guys was pulling something out of the trunk he managed to catch two keys and rip them off the keyboard. Fortunately this can be fixed. Unfortunately the two keys were Middle C and the B right below it. If you know anything about playing the piano you know that Middle C is one of the most, if not the most important key on the keyboard. Needless to say, there was a bit of a panic over what to do. We had to have the keyboard to perform, but how was I going to play it with two keys missing???? My mom asked if it was possible, I didn't think it was, but we set it up anyway and decided to give it a try. Now, if two missing keys was the only mishap that would have been alright, but there was more to come. We set everything up and plugged everything in and I started to play (very interesting when you are trying to avoid notes that are at a central point on the keyboard) and I noticed that the pedal was not working. It wasn't that it wasn't sustaining; it was continuously sustaining! I didn't even have to push it; it held the notes without my even touching it! Basically, it was operating backwards. If I held it down it cut the sound of the note and if I released it it held the sound of the note. So, here I am trying to play a keyboard with missing keys and trying to use a pedal the opposite of how it was intended to be used. LOL!!!! I laughed through the entire performance. It was crazy! God is so good, though, and it didn't sound too terrible. Afterwards the kids tried to console me. "Don't worry. It actually didn't sound much different than it usually does." I know they were meaning that in a complimentary way ;]. Ya, my afternoon was definitely interesting!
That rest of the day was much more tame compared to that, but it still had its quirks. Really, though, the best part of the day was last night. My music group sang at a homeless shelter we go to twice a month. The majority of the people there are right off the street and they are some of the hardest people you will ever work with. They are the ones you see begging for money on the side of the road or drunk out of their minds lying on a bus stop bench. Usually when we sing there it is hard to get the men to join in the singing, even the ones that call themselves Christians, but last night something happened. Those men were joining in the singing and clapping and they were worshiping, something you never see. It really felt like we were in church. Everyone in my group had so much joy, which wouldn't be amazing except that we are all super busy and by the time we get to the mission we are usually so worn out and in need something supernatural to revive us and give us energy to sing and play. Truly, the joy of the Lord was our strength. Last night it was like there was electricity in the building. The men were standing and raising their hands and just praising God. It was incredible to see and to experience. There was one song that we did that really had a huge impact. We've sung it there at least a hundred times, but this time was different. It's a slow ballad that says, "Come as you are, open hands, broken hearts, come as you are. Prodigal daughters and sons, everyone, all will be forgiven no matter what you've done. And when the Father sees you, He will run, no matter how far, come as you are." It's a beautiful song but not something you would expect hardened street people to respond to. They did last night. When we were done singing it I looked at the audience and men were standing with their hands stretched towards heaven just crying out to God. That may not be an unusual sight if you were in a normal church on a Sunday morning, but at this place, you don't ever see that happen. The whole service was just amazing. I have never felt the presence of the Holy Spirit like that in that mission, but God was there and it was so good.
So, ya, my day was interesting to say the least, but it was so good. The joy I started out with in the morning stayed with me throughout out the day. Even on the way home as my friends and I talked about our day I couldn't help laughing as I recounted the day's events. I was still so full of happiness and joy. I wish I had more days like that and maybe I will. I have found that the more I let God into my life, the more I yield to Him, the more I experience His presence and His working in my day to day life, and that is what makes for interesting days that are filled with joy.

Thoughts On Life

There's an interesting note on my fridge. Life is just around the corner. Hmm. I was under the impression life is now. Sometimes I act as though it is just around the corner and in the meantime I am waiting for whatever will happen to happen; but life is happening right now. Sure, there are twists and turns, and I am sure there are several corners for me to turn, some that are nearer than I think perhaps, but life is never just around the corner. Not that I want to pick on whoever posted the note. I'm glad you posted it. It just caught my attention and I had to comment. There is some truth to it, though. What life will turn out to be is unseen. Living life with a sense of expectancy is a good thing, especially when the expectancy is of something good. Actually, it's funny that the note was there because I wanted to post on life and my general attitude towards it anyway. As with everyone, there are thing that I have struggled with in my personal life since I was a small child. There have been thing that I have allowed to hold me back and keep me from pursuing my dreams and accomplishing my life goals. I am not realizing this now for the first time; it really hit me about three years ago and I have been working on it ever since. You know the old saying, "Rome wasn't built in a day"? Well, bad habits and poor outlooks on life and of yourself aren't destroyed in one either. It took me twenty years to reach the very sad state I was in, and it will take me some time to fully pull myself out of it. Of course, it is very helpful that I have a wonderful Friend Who always is so faithful to help me and show me things I need to do and changes I need to make to get me out of the pit I was in. Three years ago I asked the Lord to show me every area in my life that needed healing, needed to change, and needed me to allow God to do His work in me. In the past three years it has been hard to face some of the things about myself that I have seen, it has been hard to face the weaknesses that I now know I have, and it has been hard to not only face but deal with the immense amount of hurts that I had accumulated in my short life. I posted last week that I had allowed hurt and pain and my emotions to be my lord instead if Jesus, and I am finding that is more true than I ever thought. However, Jesus has been faithful to help me through all the different things I have dealt with and He is still faithful to help me now. It has been some time now since I lost focus of what I was doing and what I wanted to accomplish with my life and I have allowed my emotions and my desires to get the better of me. In short, I have been acting very foolishly. However, I was reminded of my prayer three years ago, and although facing what you are like and allowing the Lord to change you into what He wants you to be, into the whole person He designed you to be, is hard the thought of ignoring Him and living this life as though He did not exist is unimaginable. I would so much rather let Him do His work in my life and endure the pain of the process and the joy of the outcome than to continue on the way I am foolishly thinking my feeble attempts at fixing myself will ever amount to anything more than a patched up, barely held together person that has little purpose or design to their life. Perhaps you think that is ridiculous and you feel that you have the power within yourself to change who you are and what you are and you believe your life is great with no need for a God to tell you what to do and how to live your life. That is your prerogative and your right. I choose to believe differently because I know differently and each person will act on what they know. I have known Jesus for close to twenty years and He has never failed me, never done me wrong, never not helped me when I asked or even when I needed it and didn't have the good sense to ask, never been anything but a wonderful Friend. I was looking back over my life this weekend and it dawned on me that through all the years and the heartache I suffered (and being emotional I have suffered quite a bit) the only consistently good thing in my life has been my Saviour. People have failed me, my family has failed me, my church has failed me, and I have failed myself; but Jesus has always been true to me, has always been there for me and has never failed me or forsaken me. Yet, I can see so many times when I rejected Him, turned Him away, refused His help thinking it was not enough. Oh, how stupid and foolish that was! Thank God He does not base His love and actions towards us on our behavior towards Him. I know it has taken me several years to come to this conclusion, and perhaps that is too long a time for most, but I now know, absolutely know, there is no friend like Him and there is nothing more satisfying in this life than knowing Him. He truly is everything that I have been looking for.

Monday

Well, it's Monday and the beginning of a new week. YEAH!!! I've been trying to post all weekend but my computer has refused to let me, sorry. My weekend was great. I got to relax, see an old friend, and spend some much needed time with my church family. It's amazing to me how easy it is to forget how much God's Word means to me and how much it helps with whatever is going on in my life. I was listening to some messages this weekend from a preacher I haven't heard in a long time and I was reminded of so many things. Things I had forgotten, Scriptures I hadn't read in years, principles that I have know for some time but have never really practiced. It was great to remember and to start putting those things to use. The Bible talks about there being two parts to every person - the spirit and the flesh or physical body. These two parts are in opposition to each other and constantly fight to gain the upper hand over each other. So there is a constant struggle on the inside of everyone over doing right and wrong. As a Christian, my spirit has been reborn and I now have power through Christ to let my spirit have the ultimate say so in whatever I do and to bring my flesh under control. Sometimes, though, I forget that or choose to let my flesh rule things and I my spirit man becomes very weak. When I go back to the Bible and start reading and saying Scriptures to myself, my spirit man is revived and it's like a breath of fresh air. My flesh may not like my praying and spending time with God, but my spirit LOVES it, and I always feel so much better when I make the choice to build my spirit man as opposed to letting my flesh run wild.
Hmm. I wasn't planning on writing any of that, but there it is. This week should be a good week. I am so much more optimistic than last week and I am finally starting to see things take shape in my life. I have the skeleton of a plan for school this fall, I am starting to make plans for future in graduate school and I only have about three weeks until I go on vacation (my first in 2 years!). I still have a lot of work to do and there are still many decisions to make, but I am finally satisfied that the boll is rolling sufficiently enough to have some confidence that things will get under way and follow a pretty good course. Did that make sense? I'm not sure, but oh well. ;) Anyhoo, life is good, God is GREAT, and I am so glad I am alive and so thankful for how blessed I truly am.
If my computer allows me I will post more later. There are still some things I want to post on, but who knows if it will actually happen. Guess I'll wait and see.

A Long Post

I tried to post yesterday but my internet connection rebelled and refused to let me. So, you get two posts in one. Actually, I have a million thoughts and hundreds of subjects I want to talk about because they are filling my thoughts so I will post little bits of different things.
LOVE: what is it and when do you know if it's true or not? As someone who has been in love with love more times than I can count I have a lot of experience with feelings that are not love. But if those feelings are not love, what is? I know that loves comes from God because the Bible says that God is love and true love has all the attributes of God - it is patient, kind, unending, unconditional, not selfish. So, infatuation, attraction, and lust cannot be love; but sometimes it is so hard to tell the difference between those feelings and real love. Perhaps time is the ultimate factor in determining what real love is. If it lasts, then it must be true; if it doesn't, then it must not be. Is that really a valid argument? Also, while you can't control who you are attracted to and those whom you seem to "connect" with, you can control what you do with that person and you can choose whether or not you will live your life in love with them or live your life without them. In all honesty, I'm not quite sure how that works out and I can say from personal experience that it is one hard thing to do, but it can be done. For those of you who would argue against making a decision like that, what if you had an attraction or a connection with someone that was a horrible person? Should you choose to stay with them because of that connection, or should you do what is best and move away from them? Ultimately, the only thing I absolutely know is that no matter how I feel if I will do what is right, what is best, then things will work out for the best, even if it means that things aren't so great in the meantime.
WHY I HATE BEING A WOMAN: No, I haven't lost my mind. I don't really hate being a woman. In fact, I don't think I could handle being a man (I would hate myself) and I have no desire to be one, but, there are definite down sides to the female state. I hate that I am so darn emotional! It is so annoying that as a woman your emotions play into almost everything you do. Why can't I just make clean, sometimes cold, decisions about things and move on. NOOOOO, I have to have some sort of emotional tie to just about everything, and it can keep me from doing the things I need to do. Darn it!!!!! Also, this whole hormone thing - we definitely got the raw end of the deal. Hormones should not have the power to change your mood, your physical well being, or your schedule! It's wrong that men don't have to experience any of it and can understand even less. Lastly, I wish that being independent as a woman didn't mean that you are either a female wanting to be a man or a woman that hates men. I am neither, but I am very independent. My independence does not have anything to do with men at all. It just means I have a desire to be a mature, responsible adult who can take care of herself and doesn't need to rely on a man or any other human being to take care of her. My independence is more a symbol of my competence and ability than a reflection of my view of those around me. For some reason, though, most of the people I know miss that point.
FUN POINT: I love being with my kids. For the past two days we have had some extra rehearsals so they can learn some new songs, and let me tell you, there were some very interesting occurrences. Things got a little silly the first day, but yesterday they were totally silly. On Wednesday, there was the usual talking and giddiness, the annoying of each other and egging each other on, and the general kids being kids that goes on. Yesterday, day we took things to a different level. The kids were getting tired and, thankfully, they let it out by being silly. There were farting jokes, bad breath jokes, crazy dancing and antics (LOL!!!), talking and singing in different voices and accents, pretending to be opera stars, and of course mistakes that were just too funny to keep going on. At the end of rehearsal it started to rain and I let the kids go outside for a while. There was this incredible rainbow in the sky and with the rain falling on us, everything was gorgeous. The kids ran around and rolled in the wet grass for a while before we went back in. It was great! Definitely a nice break for them and me.
NOTE OF INTEREST: Recently I have been looking for information on scientist who are Christians. I don't mean preachers who know something about science. I mean real scientist who practice and currently do research in their field of study. I have been having several conversations with several friends about various science topics and I was wondering what a scientist with a belief in God would think or say about said topics. It took me a while and I was beginning to think none existed, but in the past two weeks I have found more websites, blogs, and publications than I know what to do with. There really are credible scientific arguments and debates out there about the earth and its laws and origins that are based in the Bible and Christian beliefs. For those truly curious enough to look and seek out what a Christian perspective is as well as plausible arguments for those things we cannot prove, there is plenty of information out there.

Sheesh!

AHHHH! UGHHHHH! Grrrrr!!!!! No, I'm not mentally ill; no, I'm not confused; no, I'm not stupid and irrational (at least not all the time); yes, I am old enough to comprehend simple instructions on how to perform relatively simple tasks; no, I don't need a man to do everything for me; yes, I am capable of being a responsible productive adult. Any other questions you'd like me to answer? I HATE when people try to make me feel like I am two inches tall with a brain the size of a poppy seed and even less capability than physical stature. It drives me nuts! I go out of my way to let people know that I am not helpless, I am extremely independent, and I can manage most things on my own. If I need your help I will ask for it and my asking for help does not mean I need you to do it for me; it means I need help! I might not be the world's best and brightest but I am certainly not a dead light bulb either. I can do just about anything I determine I will do and my asking for help along the way doesn't mean I can't perform whatever task I am doing, it means I need some instruction on how to do something or some help with it and then you can move on your merry way and let me finish what I started. I don't want you to take it over and do it yourself; I want you to help me and that's it! Ok, I'm ranting. I'll stop. Sometimes the culmination of several things just gets to the point where I have to get things off my chest and since this medium allows me to do that, I do it. Sorry if you are completely annoyed. In case you missed it my day has been a bit frustrating. Nothing too terrible, but it is something that has been building and it finally got to be too much today. I was starting to get that animal trapped in a cage feeling and I knew I was going to have to let it all out sooner or later. I'd rather rant at no one in particular than scare someone venting at them. So, while this hasn't been one of my favorite days I will survive. Actually, there were some funny moments with my kids and the day is not over yet, so there is still hope for it. I think the stress of trying to talk to advisers and teachers, looking at graduate programs, looking for a new job, trying to budget for the next two months, and get ready for the GRE is starting to take a toll on me. It's a good thing the week is half over and the weekend will be here soon. I'm going to need it!!!!!

Thoughts

It's beautiful today in Tucson. The sky is slightly overcast making this a somewhat dreary day, but it is a nice sort of dreary, one that promises rain and thunderstorms. There was a cool breeze this morning as the rain from the past few days has cooled down the hot desert. Oh how I wish I could spend my day outside, but that is not to be. Hopefully, though, I will get to watch a great monsoon storm from my living room window later this afternoon. I love watching the clouds roll in over the mountains and the storm descend on Tucson. It's so amazing to watch. Anyway, enough of me being silly. My weekend was good and I am off to face another week of work. This week I hope to get some answers about my academic future. I have decided that I will make a decision about what course of action to take by the end of this week. Either I will give up my dream of a Master's degree and doctoral work in my field of study or I will press on, finding some way to accomplish what I want. I feel like I've been on vacation from my life for several months and it's time for me to refocus myself and get to work. Avoiding things never works because they will still be there waiting for you whenever you decide to actually face them and usually you've lost a precious commodity - time - in the process. You know, life can be tricky to live sometimes and going off course can be something that happens before you ever realize what took place. I came to a realization this weekend: I'm way off course. I was so focused last year, so sure of what I was doing and where I was going, and now I feel hopelessly lost, confused as to which direction to take and unsure of myself and my ability to make proper judgments at this time. BUT, those are only feelings; there is a greater truth to the situation. The truth is that Jesus said He would never leave me or forsake me, even when I take side roads that lead me off course, and He knows which direction I should be heading in and His Spirit is my guide, helping me get back on track and start heading in the right direction again. Whenever I find myself in a mess or in a situation that is not good I always ask myself how I got there and what could I have done to have prevented it. I asked the Lord this morning why I had to go through what I am going through and why things went the way they did, what was He trying to teach me through all of it. His response was that things went the way they did because I have been pretending for so long that I am a whole, complete person, totally satisfied with Jesus, when in reality I am not. I have allowed hurt, scars, emotions and desires to be my lord instead of Jesus. I have looked to people to fill my needs rather than to the One Who is most able to do so. I have spent so much time trying to not be needy rather than just facing the fact that I am and letting Jesus heal me. It's a hard thing to do, a hard thing to admit, but there it is. When Jesus becomes more precious to me than anything on this earth, and I can find my total completion and wholeness in Him, then I will be a complete person, not lacking in any area and no longer susceptible to being run by the people and things around me. I have known for quite some time that I was in desperate need of healing in several areas of my life, but I have not really allowed the Lord to heal me completely. I have looked to people and circumstances to help me, and they fail every time because they cannot do what only my Heavenly Father can do. So, now I am facing things head on, repenting for the things I know I have done wrong and the ways I have helped hurt myself, asking Jesus to heal every part of me that is broken and in need of healing, surrendering every area of my life to Him to do with as He pleases, and learning how to truly lean on the everlasting arms, resting safe and secure in Him.

My Oh So Relaxing Day

So, I don't have too many days when I do virtually nothing. July 4th was the closest I have come in months. I actually slept in and laid around my house until around 2 p.m. when I had to start getting ready for my big show at church that night. But, this week I had two days of relaxing. Today I did get up early and practiced on my beautiful new grand piano for about an hour, but the rest of the day was all mine. I hung out with friends, watched a movie, went swimming (oh, that was so great because the water was awesome, just perfect), was able to spend time just sitting and reading and studying my Bible and praying, got home early, and then went out with one of my brothers that I hardly ever spend time with. He asked me to go to a couple of stores with him and I found myself at the Starbucks counter in the Barnes & Noble store on the north side of town. Ordering Starbucks in my favorite store was the perfect way to end this practically perfect day. Of course, I must stop gushing for a moment to rant about something ridiculous. I ordered this huge chocolate chip cookie from Starbucks for which I paid an un-Godly sum of money, but I was thinking my satisfaction with said cookie would outweigh any pangs of guilt I might have over the amount spent acquiring it. WRONG!!!! I opened my little white paper sack with much excitement and pulled out the cookie to take a bite. My teeth clamped downed and "CRUNCH!" I was eating a rock with chocolate morsels in it. I couldn't believe it! Cookies are supposed to be soft and melt in your mouth and if you are paying a ridiculous sum of money for them, they better be that way. But NO, this one was like a giant Chips Ahoy crunchy cookie. Bleck!!! I couldn't believe my luck. Fortunately there was a good deal of chocolate and that made everything bearable, but I will never again make the mistake of ordering cookies from Starbucks. Anyhooo, my day was great and I am so glad I had it. It's nice to take time and just sit back and relax, especially after a long haul of performances and rehearsals. This weekend has been nice and I am hoping it will remain that way until Monday morning when I have to once again face the horrible reality of work and daily life.

Salvation

The how or why of salvation seems to be something that is elusive to so many people. Perhaps it is because of my Christian upbringing and perhaps it is due to my own salvation experience, but the concept seems so simple to me. God created man to have a relationship with him. When man chose to sin that relationship became impossible. Instead of communion with God there was a rift because God is holy and He cannot be around or abide with sin. To correct this God sent His Son Jesus to bridge the gap and make a way for us to again have a relationship with God. That is why in John 3:16 it says that God loved the world so much that He gave His Only Son so that anyone who believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. God is the source of life and without Him there is only death or the lack of life. So, without out God we are dead. Our physical bodies still live and breathe, but we are spiritually dead. We are spiritually dead because we sin. We are both born sinners and we sin by choice. This makes us all equal. Romans 3:23 says "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." That means that everyone is in need of salvation no matter who you are, what you own, what you have accomplished, how intelligent you are, how good you have attempted to be, or how successful in any respect you are. Everyone is still a sinner, dead to God, and in need of salvation in order to become spiritually alive. The salvation comes when we recognize our need for God, see ourselves as sinners dead to God, repent and accept the blood of Jesus as atonement for our sins and make Him the Lord of our lives. Then we are "re-born" and our spirit becomes alive, the relationship with God is established and we are one with the Jesus Christ. His Spirit lives in us and our lives become a manifestation of Him, not us. Every area of your life should be taken up with Jesus and what people should see is not you, but Him. Yes, you still have a personality and there are things that are specific to you; God made you the way you are and He likes the differences, but He wants those differences to be Christ controlled so that He can accomplish His will in the earth and in your life. His will is to give you the best in every area and to bless you and those around you, but too many people fail to see this. They view salvation as a ball and chain and run from anything having to do with God for fear that He will snap on the links if you get to close and that will be it - your enjoyable life will be over, you will be forced to live the drab dreary life of a Christian, and really the opposite is true. Salvation brings true freedom and the ability to live life to its fullest both for yourself and for the world around you. Jesus said He came to give us life and life more abundantly. In other words He came not just to give us life but life lived to its fullest, reaching the highest heights possible. The "chains" with which you are bound by Christ are the those of love, faith, hope, peace, and righteousness. "For the kingdom of God is. . .righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit." Romans 14:17 Jesus died so that we might have life, not experience more death. Yes, there is a dying to yourself and your desires, but the life you give up is replaced with the incredible life of Christ and that goes above and beyond anything you can ask or think.
So, while others may find it hard to grasp salvation, or perhaps it would be better said they find hard to accept salvation, it really is not complicated. It is simple enough for anyone to understand, but you have to be willing. Two more scriptures and then I'm done.
"For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." I Corinthians 1:18
"And said, Truly I say to you, unless you repent (change, turn about) and become like little children [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving], you can never enter the kingdom of heaven [at all]." Matthew 18:3.

Added Links

For those of you who are very observant you will notice without my saying so that I have added some new links to my links list at the bottom of my page. For those of you who wouldn't notice much of anything unless it was staring you in the face, I'm letting you know. Most of the new links are science related. I've been having several very interesting conversations about science with some friends of mine and this has led me to do some looking into certain things. Science of any kind has always fascinated me and research is something I love. So, in the midst of looking for information I have found several websites and blogs that are really interesting. They pose good questions and explore interesting topics as well as expose me to some brilliant minds out there. I hope you will actually take the time to look up what I have posted and then do some more looking on your own if you find the subjects interest you.

July 4th

Happy July 4th! Today we celebrate the birth of my favorite nation, the United States of America. This country is by no means perfect, has much room for improvement and has failed in many ways over the past 231 years. However, it has been a champion of freedom and both human and civil rights around the world, has helped countless nations around the world, and has been a voice for democracy since its inception. It has encouraged free thinking and the pursuit of knowledge and has helped lead out in the discovery and manufacturing of new ideas and exploring new horizons in science, technology, business, and health care. While I may not agree all the time with those in power I recognize that because I live in the nation I do I have the power to change who is in authority and to have a voice in how my country is run. Our founding father used great wisdom in setting up the republic system they did and I am so grateful is has stood the test of time thus far, and I hope it will continue to do so. I also want to mention how grateful I am to all those who have served and are currently serving in our armed forces. Thank you for your sacrifice and for being willing to give of yourself to protect and defend the rest of us here at home. Also, thank you to the families of these brave men and women. Thank you for supporting them and encouraging them as they give of themselves to benefit this nation.
I know for a lot of people July 4th is not a big deal. The holiday comes and goes with little notice of it or recognition of its significance. For me that is not the case. Ever since I was a little girl the 4th has been the major point of every summer. I have been gathering with friends and family at my church to sing patriotic songs and watch the fireworks from our hillside ever since I can remember. There has always been cake and ice cream and, of course, watermelon. It was always stressed how important it was to remember where we came from and look at where we are going. I was taught to have a deep respect for those who gave of themselves to birth and support this nation and for those who are currently giving of themselves to protect this nation and ensure its long life. These are things I want to hang on to and hope to some day pass on to my children. So, if you never thought of paying much attention to this holiday, I hope you reconsider; and I will continue celebrating just as I have done for the past 20 plus years. Hope you all have a wonderful day!!!!!!

Women In the Revolutionary War

Read the fresh annals of our land the gathering dust of time
Nor yet has fallen on the scroll to dim the tale sublime;
There woman's glory proudly shines, for willingly she gave
Her costliest offerings to uphold the generous and the brave
Who fought her country's battles well; and oft she perilled life
To save a father, brother, friend, In those dark years of strife.
Whatever strong-armed man hath wrought, whatever he hath won,
That goal hath woman also reached, that action hath she done."
Mary M. Chase

As we prepare to celebrate the birth of this nation there will be much talk of the great heroes involved in securing freedom for us as well as those who helped birth this nation. However, the talk will in large part be about men. I am not opposed to honoring the great men throughout our history that have been heroes and patriots but I do feel that the women should receive just as much recognition. I want to dedicate this post to the memory of all the female heroes of the Revolutionary War. Here are a few of them. NOTE: These excerpts were collected from various websites and were edited by myself, but they are not my writings or compilations.
DEBORAH SAMSON**
In October of 1778 Deborah Samson of Plympton, Massachusetts disguised herself as a young man and presented herself to the American army as a willing volunteer to oppose the common enemy. She enlisted for the whole term of the war as Robert Shirtliffe and served in the company of Captain Nathan Thayer of Medway, Massachusetts. For three years she served in various duties and was wounded twice - the first time by a sword cut on the side of the head and four months later she was shot through the shoulder. She was later awarded a pension for her service to her country.
Margaret Corbin : During the Revolutionary War many women would follow the men around, taking care of cooking and other needs. Margaret Corbin stayed by her husband when the British attacked Fort Washington in New York. She took over her husband's job as matross, the person who loaded the cannon, when the gunner was killed. In the heat of battle her husband was also killed. She was hit and left for dead. A passing doctor saved her life. Her wounds left her permanently disabled. For her bravery, "Captain Molly" became part of the Invalid Regiment. She was the first woman to receive a lifetime pension for the wounds she suffered in battle.
Nancy Hart: When British soldiers came to question her about helping out a Patriot soldier, she brazenly admitted to it. Forced to cook the British a meal, she killed two of them. No, not with her cooking, with their own muskets. Once, when information about British plans were needed, Nancy disguised herself as a crazy man. She went about the British camp gathering vital information for the Patriot cause. Nancy is honored in Georgia with a county named after her and her portrait is in the state capital.
Martha Bratton: Martha and her husband were entrusted with a precious commodity back then - gun powder. With her husband away, Martha was left in charge. Hearing that the British were planning to steal the gun powder, Martha set a trap, blowing up the building as the British soldiers arrived. She even admitted doing the dastardly deed when captured. She was let go, later questioned about her husband's whereabouts, and spared by a British officer from severe punishment. She repaid the debt, when the same officer was captured by Patriots and scheduled for hanging. Realizing the cruelty of war, Martha set up a hospital and nursed both British and American soldiers
Prudence Wright: With their men out looking for British soldiers, Prudence Wright gathered the women of Groton, Massachusetts. They would defend the bridge leading into town. Putting on their husbands clothes, they armed themselves with whatever they could get their hands on, some using pitchforks. They hid in the reeds until a British officer came by, given away by his horse's hooves on the bridge. The women removed the secret messages he was carrying, passing them on to the local Patriot Committee of Safety. Back home, the women laughed at the surprise of the British officer when he found out that he had been had by women.
Sybil Ludington rode through Connecticut on a chilly April night and yelled that the British were burning Danbury and warned soldiers to prepare for a raid. Thanks to her daring actions, the British were halted at Ridgefield, Connecticut on April 27, 1777 and were forced to retreat to Long Island Sound.
Of course any mention of women who aided in the War of American Independence would not be complete without a mention of Abigail Adams. It has been said that many of the ideas her husband espoused were taken directly from the letters she wrote him during the time this nation declared its independence from Britain. Here is a quote from her. "This intelligence will make a plain path for you, though a dangerous one. I could not join to-day in the petitions of our worthy pastor for a reconciliation between our no longer parent state, but tyrant and these Colonies. Let us separate: they are unworthy to be our brethren. Let us renounce them and instead of supplications, as formerly, for prosperity and happiness, let us beseech the almighty to blast their counsels, and to bring to nought all their devices."
There were many more women involved in every aspect of the war from fighting to nursing the sick to working from home to raise money and provide supplies for the troops. Without the aid of all these women, the War would not have been the success it was. So, as we remember the great men who helped found this nation, remember the women who also helped by inspiring these great men, fighting beside them, and working endlessly to ensure the independence of this new nation.

My Life Right Now

Ok, so my life is crazy, busy and wicked awesome (as my friend says). July 4th is Wednesday and I have been performing and rehearsing like crazy and the fun won't stop until Thursday. Of course in the midst of all this business I am also trying to make some serious plans about my future and that takes brain energy as well physical and emotional energy. So, needless to say I have been a bit tired of late but the weekend gave me some great sleep catch up and some relaxation, so I think I'm good. I have five performances before my biggest one Wednesday night so I'm thinking the only thing I'm going to do Wednesday during the day is see Bruce Willis' new movie "Live Free of Die Hard". Actually, there are three or four movies I want to see but that one is at the top of my list at the moment. I haven't seen a good action movie in quite a while and it's been even longer since I saw one in theaters. I think the third Lord of the Rings was the last thing like that I saw in a theater. Sad, I know, but there are more important things to do in life. ;) Anyway, so my life has been slightly less than chaotic and thus the reason for the sad number of posts, but I can guarantee you that is going to change, especially in the next couple of days. I have several things I want to post and I don't know if I will get to all of them but I will attempt. So. sorry if you've kept checking my page and been annoyed that there weren't any updates. I hope my explanation leaves me room for forgiveness. I promise to do better.

*About Me* Favorite sport growing up: soccer - I was always better with my feet than my hands. Favorite color when I was a kid: brown - I have none now that I'm an adult. Favorite animal when I was a kid: horses. Favorite subject in school: Literature with History as a close second. Favorite language: Spanish. Favorite time of the day: sunset. Favorite pet: my two dogs.