On Being A Woman

I know it might sound strange to many of you, but I have always struggled with being a woman.  I don't struggle with wanting to be a woman or enjoying the 'girly' things my DNA predetermined would make me happy.  I struggle with the position in life that being a woman relegates you to.  Mostly this is an historical position, but I never cease to be amazed at its persistence in today's society.  I find it frustrating that I can acknowledge the differences in men and women and yet cannot be satisfied with duties and positions those differences tend to create.  Why is that?  Why do I consistently struggle against what has been and is an established way of doing things and viewing things?  Why must I always ask 'why'?  And not only do I ask 'why', but I am most always not satisfied with the answer that follows that question.  Is it because I am so inherently stubborn and obstinate that I must fight against something, must always rage against the predetermined set boundaries?  Perhaps.  It is certainly a viable answer for my ongoing struggle with who I am.  And yet, I feel there is more to it than that.  Underneath the tough layer of simple female stubbornness, I sense an opposition to the illogical, chauvinistic tendencies with which many of the world's societies are run, and that opposition is what stokes the fires of my unrest and causes them to boil up and over from time to time.  While my outbursts are not always legitimate, often times they are the result of this eternal stewing that goes on in my head.  I see something I want, and I am told I can't have it because I am a woman and those things are meant for men.  I have dreams I want to accomplish, and I am told dreams are childish pursuits best suited for men.  Women are to be caregivers and nourishment providers to those around us and that takes a mature, responsible adult; not a child chasing whimsies.  I have a mind that I want to develop and stretch and I am told that I need to limit myself lest I become too intimidating and people refuse to interact with me.  I have opinions and thoughts and I want to express them, to discuss them, and I am told that is too aggressive and I will be viewed as an unpleasant woman.  Why?  The simple answer always comes back to my gender -- I am a woman.  I hate that!  Who ever put a limit on a man and told him it was for the plain fact that he was a man?  While I'm sure there are rare examples that could be provided, the vast majority of time and experience have produced very little evidence of this.
Don't get me wrong.  I am not trying to squelch men or infringe on their rights.  I would be no happier with limits on men as I am with limits on women.  I am merely pointing out that I am, indeed, truly unhappy and frustrated with the limits I am continuously running into because I am a woman.  I respect the differences in men and women and I accept that those differences do require respective differences in roles and responsibilities in life.  What I do not respect, and do not accept, is the notion that as a woman I am bound to operate within the confines of a box some prehistoric male dreamt up hundreds of years ago, and subsequent males have continued using for generations.  Sorry, that's not the way I work, and as long as I have breath in me I will fight to operate within the confines of who I am, who I was created to be, and those will be the only boundaries I will ever settle for.  I guess that means the struggle will continue, but that is better than settling for what is wholly unacceptable to me.